IN THE CURRENT MAGAZINE

Feet shuffling, I made my way through the darkened tunnel. I was part of a handcuffed, chained sea of men in orange that was slowly making its way through an underground tunnel toward the courthouse. We shuffled, a few inches at a time, because our ankles were connected by chains.

For many of us, our addiction is a disease of isolation and loneliness. Even those of us who have been outwardly successful—with families, careers, and a group of friends—often find that our relationships are really only superficial. Addicts, for the most part, have real trouble connecting on an emotional level with other people.

It seems like only yesterday that my old friend and sponsor Jess L., shared with me a wonderful story. He said that there once was a world-renowned football team that had successful seasons year after year. One year, however, things were not going well for the team.

I found SA and started my recovery journey just over three years ago. Going into recovery, I expected to learn just what I needed to do in order to not act out. I soon discovered, however, that the program provides me with tools to better face life and life’s challenges—to be able to actually grow stronger through them, not just get through them.

Recently, a friend shared with me the terror, frustration, bewilderment, and despair he was feeling as a consequence of our disease. I told him that these emotions are the natural consequence of the old way of living; that they are what we reap when we sow the seeds of lust.

I like to look up definitions of key words used in the Twelve Steps. I use a 1934 Webster’s Dictionary that was current when the Big Book was written. Key words and their definitions have become the subject of my artwork.

In July 2011, our 6:30 group (under the Nashville Intergroup) decided to have monthly speaker meetings. One of the first talks was on Step Four. The speaker focused on the Big Book pages on how to work Step Four (AA 64-71), and as he went along, he shared his personal experience related to working each phase of the Step.

I happened to notice while reading Beginnings: Notes on the Origin and Early Growth of SA that the “first issue of the SA newsletter with the ESSAY masthead” was printed November 15, 1981 (14). That means ESSAY is 30 years old this year!

Start the New Year in fellowship by joining us for a weekend of recovery, fun, and inspiration at our winter convention at the Ramada Hotel in Birmingham, UK. I have found that the farther I travel to a convention, the more my recovery seems to benefit.

As gift, I recently received a very beautiful pendant. I learned that the minimum number of cuts a diamond is required to have in order to meet certain specifications is 52. This diamond was not ordinary: it had 72 cuts or 72 beautiful facets with which to reflect the many colors of light.